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Today, all of us who were connected to TVUUC sat in front of our TVs and the internet, waiting for some answers. Anything that helped make this event seem less random. We got some word but for me, it still makes this tragedy senseless. Reportedly, the gunman felt angry at his joblessness status and wanted to make an impact on the “liberal movement”. If you are a member of TVUUC or you have read more about it since this incident, yes, we are a liberal faith meaning we are OPEN to anyone and everyone regardless of race, creed, culture, sexual orientation or prior religious affiliation. TVUUC is a community of people who welcome all with open doors and do their best to not judge anyone who enters there. It was my first church community that I even considered after the death of my Mom almost 10 years ago…I was searching for a sense of belonging and spiritual connection, even with my ambiguous faith that surfaced after the loss of someone I loved. I found it at TVUUC. While, I never felt like I completely fit in…it was the most sense of belonging I had to a church in a decade. Some of the biggest choices in my adult life were made with some of the members of that church. Some choices were beautiful and hopeful, and some choices were hard and heartbreaking. All along, I had faith that even with some of those difficult choices that the congregation would hold each other up and take care of those who needed it most. When I walked away (for a while), I did so to allow time for healing. Now, I cannot even consider NOT going back to help heal with everyone. I talked to a number of my TVUUC friends last night and for the first time realized that I can change my relationships RIGHT NOW. I can continue to limp around with past wounds and not engage. I could just sit and stew, soured by someone’s expression of frustration. I am angry, but when do we start to use anger for something more than negative. Now, because something has threatened an institution I believe has only has set out to do things like promote acceptance, peace and unconditional love – I cannot and will not runaway. I only pray and hope that this tragedy creates a stronger sense of community and reforms bonds of love and acceptance in this country…that’s all I can pray for. Peace, love and hope…three things that matter most in a time of chaos and hurt. I pray that everyone will work towards this and turn their pain and anger into something more, something greater and something powerful…for something good.
We sit here. Stunned and disbelieving. The tragedy is closer to us than we had previously thought and is devastating.
We can say nothing right now because nothing makes any sense.
We just want people to do 3 things:
1) Please help if you can.
2) Keep the wonderful people and the families of the vicitms deep in our prayers and thoughts.
3) Know that TVUUC is a place of genuine peace and love and work in your lives to increase both of these things in this world. The world has lost one of those great people who promoted and lived BOTH; a man of true honor and goodness. Few of us can walk in his shoes, but by God we can sure try.
Without going into much detail, I have a special relationship past with TVUUC. I have not returned to the church since April of this year but I often think about the people who attend there and admire their courage and peacefulness. Today, the Jim and I sit stunned. Apparently another potentially random act of violence has struck what I often saw as a center of solace in East Tennessee. My heart breaks for the community. Our love, thoughts, prayers and hope go out to our once church home and family.
I am so so so sorry and saddened by this. My heart truly breaks for this…I pray that all my former family members are okay. I don’t know what else to say. Too much. Too much.
Okay, so it sounds more elaborate than it really is right? This is our little slice of internet nonsense, which basically is our on-going effort to keep our friends and family up-to-date on our lives, our love and our continuing pursuit of pomegranates. In this modern age of movement, we’ve realized that distance is not an excuse to not keep everyone posted, so please - stop by anytime - in person or internet-ly and know that you are all never far from our thoughts.
